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 By Prof Samuel Oheneba-Dornyo

Licensed Counselling Psychologist

Becoming a mother is one of the most sacred journeys a woman can experience. From the moment you discover that new life is growing inside you, something shifts, your heart begins to carry dreams, hopes, and sometimes even fears for the little one you are yet to meet. In those moments, prayer becomes more than a religious act; it becomes the lifeline between you, your child, and God.

Long before your baby takes their first breath, prayer gives you the privilege of laying a spiritual foundation for their life. Just as Hannah prayed for Samuel before he was born (1 Samuel 1:10–11), mothers today can commit their children to the Lord from the womb by laying hands on your stomach.

1. Pray for their Health and Development

Speak words of life over your baby’s body as it forms. Psalm 139:13–14 reminds us that God is knitting the child together in the secret place of the womb. Pray over their heart, brain, bones, and every part of their being, declaring God’s perfect design.

1. Pray for Their Spirit and Destiny

Every child comes into this world with a God-given purpose. Jeremiah 1:5 says, “Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart.” Pray that your baby will walk in God’s plan, grow in wisdom, and fulfill the destiny ordained for them.

1. Pray for Peace During Pregnancy and Delivery

Many mothers worry about labor and childbirth. Through prayer, you release fear and embrace God’s peace (Philippians 4:6–7). Ask for strength, safe delivery, and God’s presence in the delivery room.

When your baby finally arrives, the journey of prayer continues. A newborn is not just a gift to your family but a gift entrusted to you by God. As Mary treasured and pondered all things concerning Jesus in her heart (Luke 2:19), you too can carry your child before God daily.

1. Pray for Protection

In a world full of dangers, ask God’s covering over your child. Psalm 91 is a powerful passage to pray over your baby, declaring that no harm or plague shall come near them.

1. Pray for Growth and Character

Beyond physical growth, pray for your child’s heart. Ask God to shape their character, teaching them kindness, humility, and faithfulness. Proverbs 22:6 reminds us to “train up a child in the way he should go.” Prayer is a vital part of that training.

1. Pray for Your Parenting

Raising a child requires wisdom, patience, and grace. Pray that God will help you nurture your baby in love and discipline. Ask Him for the strength to model faith, so your child learns from your example.

• Whisper routinely short prayers while rocking your baby to sleep or during feeding times.
• Pray Bible verses directly over your child, replacing pronouns with your baby’s name.
• Write down prayers during pregnancy and continue after birth. Later, these records will serve as a testimony of God’s faithfulness in your child’s life.

Prayer is one of the most powerful gifts you can give your baby, long before they can speak, walk, or even understand. It connects their life to God’s promises, secures their future in His hands, and gives you peace as a parent. Whether your baby is in the womb, in your arms, or running around your living room, let every stage of their life be covered in prayer.

As Philippians 1:6 assures us, “He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.” That good work includes your child. Keep praying, keep trusting, and keep believing.

By Prof Samuel Oheneba-Dornyo

Licensed Counselling Psychologist

Parenting is one of the most rewarding journeys in life, yet it is also one of the heaviest responsibilities anyone can carry. From the moment a child is born, parents are flooded with advice from family, friends, books, social media, and society at large. Everyone seems to have an opinion on how to raise a child “the right way.” In today’s fast-paced and highly competitive world, many mothers and fathers silently struggle under the weight of trying to be the “perfect parent.”

But here is the truth: the idea of a flawless parent is a myth. Perfection is an impossible standard, and the pursuit of it often leaves parents feeling exhausted, inadequate, and overwhelmed. Instead of bringing joy into the parenting journey, you soon notice that it can create guilt and unnecessary stress.

The myth of the perfect parent

Social media paints a picture of spotless homes, always-smiling children, and parents who somehow juggle everything with ease. What we rarely see are the sleepless nights, the messy kitchens, the tears behind closed doors, and the moments of self-doubt.

This myth becomes especially heavy in our Ghanaian context, where cultural expectations can be overwhelming. Parents are often told:

• “A good mother sacrifices everything for her children.”
• “A good father must provide, no matter the cost.”

While sacrifice is part of parenting, these pressures can rob parents of their joy and create a cycle of guilt when reality doesn’t match the ideal.

The hidden costs of perfectionism

Trying to be a perfect parent can lead to:

• Emotional exhaustion – Constantly feeling like you’re not doing enough.
• Strained relationships – Withdrawing from your spouse, children, or community out of fear of judgment.
• Mental health struggles – Anxiety, depression, or feelings of inadequacy can grow when parents carry the weight of unrealistic standards.

In our society, where financial pressure, unemployment, and social expectations already weigh heavily, the added pressure of being a flawless parent can be crushing.

Breaking free: A path to healthy parenting

• Embrace imperfection

Children do not need flawless parents. They need real parents who try, fail, apologize, and try again. Psalm 103:13 reminds us, “As a father has compassion on his children, so the Lord has compassion on those who fear him.” God knows our weaknesses and still calls us His own.

• Prioritize presence over perfection

Children crave time, attention, and affection more than expensive toys or fancy experiences. Sharing a meal, listening to their stories, or praying with them communicates love more than material things. Deuteronomy 6:6–7 urges parents to impress God’s truth on their children by talking with them in everyday life—when sitting at home, walking, lying down, and rising up.

• Balance discipline with grace

Discipline is vital for raising responsible children, but it should never crush their spirit. As Colossians 3:21 says, “Fathers, do not embitter your children, or they will become discouraged.” Discipline should guide, not wound; correct, not condemn.

• Seek support

Parenting is not meant to be done alone. The pressures of work, finances, and family life can be heavy. Lean on trusted friends, family (whether nuclear or extended), your church community, or professionals for support. Ecclesiastes 4:9–10 reminds us: “Two are better than one… If either of them falls down, one can help the other up.”

• Practice self-care

A drained parent cannot pour love and attention into their children. Rest is not laziness—it is wisdom. Even Jesus took time away to pray and renew His strength (Mark 1:35). When parents are emotionally and physically healthy, their children benefit too.

• Celebrate small wins

Parenting is not about grand gestures alone. It’s about the daily choices to love, guide, and nurture. Celebrate the small victories—whether it’s a child learning to tie their shoes, a family meal shared, or a heartfelt conversation.

Final Encouragement

Dear parents, you don’t need to be perfect—you just need to be present. Your children are not looking for superheroes, but for love, guidance, and connection. The Bible assures us in Isaiah 41:10, “So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God.” As you raise your children, remember that God’s grace is sufficient to cover your weaknesses.

Let us choose authenticity over perfection, compassion over pressure, and love over fear. In doing so, we not only nurture confident children but also build stronger families and healthier communities.

By Prof Samuel Oheneba-Dornyo

Licensed Counselling Psychologist

Bullying is often thought of as something that happens in the classroom, on the playground, or online. We picture a child being teased by classmates or pushed around by older peers. But sometimes, the first experience of bullying a child faces is not from schoolmates—it is from home. Pain that is not healed in a parent often becomes pain passed on to the child. This truth, though difficult to face, is a call for self-reflection and healing.

When Parents Hurt Instead of Heal

Parenting is one of the highest callings, but it also demands a level of emotional wholeness that many adults have not yet achieved. A mother or father who carries unresolved trauma, bitterness, or low self-worth may unconsciously project those wounds onto their children. Instead of nurturing, they may criticize harshly. Instead of guiding, they may control with fear. Instead of affirming, they may ignore or reject.

A child experiencing this kind of treatment often feels the sting of rejection before ever encountering the world outside. The parent, who should be a place of safety, becomes the source of pain. This is why we say: a child’s first bully is an unhealed parent.

The Impact on the Child

When children are constantly belittled, compared to others, or made to feel “not good enough,” it shapes their self-image. Many grow up doubting their worth, fearing abandonment, or struggling with anxiety and insecurity. Some withdraw into silence, while others develop anger and aggression. In adulthood, these children may repeat the same patterns, becoming harsh with their own families or carrying unresolved wounds into workplaces, relationships, and even their walk with God.

In the Ghanaian context, cultural norms can sometimes deepen this pain. A parent might use insults as a form of correction, believing it builds discipline. Phrases like “W’ankasa wo bɔne dodo” (“You yourself are too bad”) or “Wo nyansa no sua” (“You are not wise”) are often spoken casually but leave scars on a child’s heart. What is said at home echoes louder than what is heard outside, because children look to their parents first for affirmation.

The Role of Healing in Parenting

An unhealed parent is not necessarily a bad person—they are often carrying unspoken wounds of their own childhood, financial struggles, or marital challenges. But unless these wounds are confronted, they become cycles of pain passed from one generation to the next.

Healing begins with awareness. A parent must first recognize when their words or actions are rooted in unresolved hurt. From there, seeking support—through counseling, prayer, trusted friends, or even professional therapy—can open the door to wholeness. Scripture reminds us that God “heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds” (Psalm 147:3). Parents who allow God to heal them can, in turn, raise children in an atmosphere of love, security, and encouragement.

Breaking the Cycle

If we want to raise confident, emotionally healthy, and spiritually grounded children, we must break the cycle of inherited pain. This means:

• Choosing healing over silence – not ignoring trauma but addressing it.
• Speaking life over children – using words that affirm rather than wound.
• Modeling resilience and humility – showing children that it is okay to seek help.
• Creating safe homes – where children feel loved, accepted, and heard.

Conclusion

Every child deserves to grow in an environment of love, safety, and affirmation. Parents are the first role models, and their words carry great power. An unhealed parent can unknowingly become the first bully in a child’s life, shaping their future in painful ways. But a healed parent—one who allows God and healthy support systems to bring restoration—can instead become the child’s greatest cheerleader, protector, and guide.

May we as parents, caregivers, and leaders choose healing for ourselves, so that we do not pass on pain but instead pass on love, strength, and hope. For when parents are healed, children can flourish.

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By Prof Samuel Oheneba-Dornyo

Licensed Counselling Pyschologist

Motherhood is one of the greatest gifts God has entrusted to women. The joy of holding a newborn baby in your arms is unmatched. Yet, the journey after delivery is often more challenging than many expect. The truth is, life after childbirth is filled with both beauty and struggle, and many mothers are left wondering, “Why didn’t anyone tell me it would be like this?”

In this article, we will reflect on some of the hidden realities of postpartum life and how mothers—and those around them—can find healing, strength, and joy in this season.

Life After Delivery: What No One Tells You

Many people expect that after delivery, life immediately returns to normal. But the truth is, everything changes. Your body feels different. Sleep becomes irregular. Your time is no longer your own. Sometimes, mothers feel guilty for not being “happy enough,” even though they are exhausted and overwhelmed. The truth is, adjusting to a new life with a baby takes time, patience, and grace. It is okay not to have it all figured out right away.

Postpartum Depression: Recognizing the Signs and Seeking Help

While it is normal to feel tired and emotional after birth, some mothers experience a deeper struggle known as postpartum depression (PPD). This is more than “baby blues.” It shows up as constant sadness, feelings of worthlessness, guilt, hopelessness, or even thoughts of harming oneself or the baby.

If you notice that you or someone you know has been feeling this way for more than two weeks, it is important to seek help. Postpartum depression is not a sign of weakness, but a real condition that can be treated. Speaking with a counselor, psychologist, or doctor can bring the needed support and healing.

Healing After Childbirth: Physical and Emotional Recovery

Childbirth is a miracle, but it is also a physical event that places tremendous stress on a woman’s body. There may be pain, fatigue, hormonal changes, and adjustments in appetite and mood. Healing takes time—sometimes weeks, sometimes months.

On the emotional side, many mothers silently carry fear, anxiety, or a sense of inadequacy. Healing here requires both patience and openness. Talking to a trusted person, seeking counseling if needed, and leaning on God’s word can make the journey lighter. Psalm 147:3 reminds us: “He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.”

The Importance of Rest and Support for New Mothers

One of the greatest needs of new mothers is rest. Yet in many homes, women are expected to “bounce back” immediately—cooking, cleaning, caring for the baby, and sometimes even returning to work too soon. This is not only unfair but also dangerous to the mother’s health.

Family and friends have a special role to play. Simple acts such as preparing meals, watching the baby so the mother can sleep, or offering words of encouragement can make all the difference. The Church community also has a role—offering prayer, visiting, and creating safe spaces where mothers can share their struggles without shame.

Rediscovering Yourself as a Mother and Woman

After childbirth, many women feel that their identity gets lost in the role of “mother.” You may miss your old routines, your work, your friendships, or even your own body. It is important to remember that motherhood is not the end of who you are—it is the beginning of a new chapter.

Take time to nurture yourself spiritually, emotionally, and physically. Continue pursuing your gifts, whether through reading, prayer, learning, or creative expression. A healthy mother is a blessing to her child, her family, and her community.

How Husbands Can Support Their Wives After Delivery

A supportive husband makes an enormous difference in the postpartum journey. Men, your wife needs more than financial help—she needs your presence, patience, and partnership. Share household responsibilities. Wake up at night sometimes to help with the baby. Encourage her when she feels overwhelmed. Pray with her and remind her she is not alone.

Ephesians 5:25 reminds husbands: “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.” True love means sacrifice, compassion, and walking alongside her in this new season.

Conclusion

Postpartum life is both a blessing and a test. It is a season of joy wrapped in tears, strength mingled with weakness, and new beginnings born out of pain. But no mother should walk this road alone. With the right support, counselling when needed, and the assurance of God’s presence, mothers can heal, rediscover themselves, and thrive in their calling.

To every mother: you are not alone. To every husband, family, and community: your love, support, and prayers can be the light that helps a new mother rise with hope. Together, we can make homes, churches, and communities places of healing, strength, and compassion.